Never Trust a Woman from Barcelona

I finally know what it's like to be used for my extremely good looks...

Apparently every summer, UCLA undergoes an invasion of Europeans looking to take some summer classes while enjoying the beautiful sunny weather and ambiance of Los Angeles. There are currently French, Spanish, German, and Italian students aged 16-26 at every turn. Summer school is pretty much an excuse for the Europeans to go out and see the glitz and glamor of LA during the peak summer months.

A few nights ago, my roommates and I went "bar-hopping" in Westwood (there are only 2 bars in Westwood). It was a typical Tuesday night, we started off at the Westwood Brewing Company
for "Electro Tuesday". We grabbed a few drinks and put on a little show on the dance floor. After a little bit, we decided that we have had enough and were ready to move on to the next bar, O'hara's (more commonly known as Maloney's). Right as we walk in, I notice that this place is packed tighter than my butt. Spaniards and Frenchmen everywhere. My roommates and I begin to walk around the bar, trying to find a place to sit. As I'm walking around, I feel someone grab my arm.

I look and see this short brown haired girl wearing a really ugly dress.
I'm just thinking "wtf?"

So I say: "um..what?"
Her: "You cannot walk by here."
Me: "why not?"
Her: "Because I do not know your name."

I started to blush a little bit..

Me: "My name is Russell, whats your name?"

I forgot what she said her name was...

Her: "Where are you from?"
Me: "I'm from around here, where are you from?"
Her: "Barcelona"
Me: "oh very cool, I want to visit there sometime."
Her:"would you like to dance?"
Me: "sure"

So we start to dance on the dance floor and she quickly starts to get really freaky.
I wasn't too attracted to this girl and her dancing started to make me uncomfortable.
She had no rhythm whatsoever, and quite frankly couldn't keep up with my fast-paced sensual teasing and grinding. She started to deliver those "signs", the kind that mean 'I want you bad'. I wasn't too thrilled about this, but I thought to myself "well, I've never hooked up with a foreign chick before, so this could be kind of cool?"

My lips slowly made their way to her neck and I gradually and smoothly moved my way upwards to her lips, leaving her quivering with excitement. After about 10 seconds, I decided that this broad was just too much of a rook.

"ok fuck this shit, this chick cant kiss and she smells bad." I thought to myself.

so After a short while, the girl abruptly stops and goes "ok I'll be right back"
And at that moment, I quickly ran the other direction.
As I was running away, I looked over my shoulder and noticed that she was doing the same thing.

"Wait a second. that's not right. only I'm supposed to be running away"

So I meet up with my roommates...
My roommate Ben goes, "Ru$, where have you been?"
Me: "dude, I just hooked up w/ a girl from Barcelona on the dance floor, it was kinda weird."
Ben: "haha no way me too"
Me: "um what?"
Ben: "yeah, it was like 10 minutes ago"

"Hmmm this sounds a little fishy, please god don't tell me I just got Ben's sloppy seconds."

Ben started to notice the disgruntled look on my face.

Ben: "haha was she short, with brown hair and braces?"

"phew, thank god. the girl I hooked up with didn't have braces. Can't be the same girl"

Me: Nah, the girl I hooked up with didn't have braces.
Ben: oh ok.

It was at that precise moment that the girl from Barcelona walked right through Ben and me.
She pretended not to see me, as she made her way through the crowded bar.
I quickly looked over at Ben.

Ben: "was that the girl you hooked up with?"
Me: "yeah.."
Ben: "Me too."

"GOD FUCKING DAMN IT."