Tuesday, March 3, 2009

My Sober Weekend

Ok so for the I believe 14th weekend in a row I have been sober. So like usual I am driving ppl all over. So I drive a lot of ppl to the party...again. we get there and there is a butt load of people, it was like one of those parties that when you open the door you can feel the heat rush at you. SO i was like Whoa there is a shit load of ppl here. Lots of people are very inebriated, one of the guys on my team has his pants off another one is dancing by himself on a table and some water polo dude is licking his teammates nipple...yea. So there is a girl from another team that I hooked up with like in September. since then she got a bf and he like bought her shit and was super nice to her and everything and didn't start having sex with her until a month in their relationship. ehehehehehe so when I hooked up with her we went to the bone yard the first night hehehehehe. Although I was very hammered and I couldn't get a full boner hehehehehe. But the next night I took her to the bone yard again. Yet once again a lil too drunk to get a fuller so I did what I could with a semi. Well I will get back to the party night. She sees me and tells my friend right next to me "I want Tommy tonight." Then she looked at me and gave me that look where a girl bites her lower lip in that really seductive manner. But I was like oh goodness she is really hammered. She kept coming up to me and was like "Tommy you need to take care of me." But I would keep making jokes that I had to take care of everyone because I am EMT certified. I end up driving her to the place she is gonna pass out and drop her off. When i get home I get some dirty text messages I LOL'ed and went to bed. Btw this girl is a good looking girl too, I mean I am sure anyone of us would take her to the bone yard. So it was funny because lately I haven't had much success with the ladies and i could have broken a pretty bad dry spell but ladies and gentlemen The Tomasarus has morals.

4 comments:

  1. Tommy,

    When will you take me to the boneyard?

    <33333333 Kristen

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  2. I like that you are comfortable enough to announce your erectile dysfunction problems to the world.

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  3. Kristen can you make my fantasy from 5th grade come true?

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  4. I'm very disappointed in you Tommy. Anyone whos nicknamed the "Tomasaurus Rex" shouldn't have morals at all. If you remember correctly, "Jurrasic Park" showed us that the T-REX was the most vicious, horrifying dinosaur of them all... he wouldn't give a shit if a Brontosaurus was sleeping, pooping, eating, or in fact drunk (dinosaurs drank cognac and vodka tonics) it would rip that vegatarian's fucking head off. The only thing T-REXesque you have Tommy is atrocious grammar. <3 Burke

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